My path to Channel 933 would have never happened had I not been a failure at nearly every other job I ever tried.
Pool boy, pig farmer, jewelry polisher, underwear model, carpenter, kissing-booth proprietor, financial analyst, and pizza delivery boy: failed at 'em all - until one day, I discovered radio & hounded a station so much that they hired me just so I would leave them alone.
Finally - gig that required minimal work and zero talent! Since that first job, my lack of talent has taken me on a wild-goose chase to numerous stations from coast to coast until I somehow managed to convince the big bosses at Channel 933 to hire me here in America's finest city.
I realize that girls only want boyfriends who have great skills. You know, like nunchuku skills, bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills...so I figured this is the perfect opportunity to really identify those areas at which I truly excel. Unfortunately, after taking a good look at myself, I realized I don't have that many skillz, so I decided to start easy...
In the video below, I attempt to smash the world record for "longest fake telephone conversation using a creme cake as a telephone". It really is...something.
If I can do it, anyone can do it & I encourage you to challenge my record. If you do, I'll post your record-breaking video here and bow at your donut-phone talking prowess.